They’re not just “busy.”
They’re comfortable.
Comfortable getting your attention whenever they want.
Comfortable giving you just enough to keep you hoping.
Comfortable avoiding the effort of real commitment.
This isn’t “early stage.”
It’s you - as the backup.
Here are 3 signs you’re in the option slot:
Excitement without plans.
Flirty messages. Quick replies. No real scheduling.
They keep the vibe alive - but never lock anything in.Last-minute free time.
You get the “you up?” energy.
You never get the “Thursday at 7 - booked” energy.
You’re not on their calendar. You’re in their gaps.Future talk with no action now.
“We should totally…” “Soon…” “When things settle down…”
Translation: not now - but don’t disappear.
The real cost isn’t your pride.
It’s weeks.
Weeks of checking your phone.
Weeks of half-committing to better options.
Weeks of your energy leaking into someone’s nothing-plan.
Warmth without effort is a signal.
They like access to you more than they like choosing you.
If you want to stop option behavior, skip the rant.
Use clear, calm texts that force clarity - without sounding upset.
Most people dodge this truth: if you keep accepting unclear, you train them to stay unclear.
And if you’re tired of going in circles - warm one moment, cold the next, confused - join Signals+ (which offers a free 7-day trial). I’ll give you simple steps to get an answer fast and move clean within the next 7 days.
NoMixedSignals